5. It is not just your fingertips, use your whole hand
Your hand is the best tool for pleasure. It is not just fingertips. It is skin touching skin. It is knuckles dancing with the folds. It is fingers, pressure, tapping, grabbing, holding… There are so many options. Allow yourself to be free and creative. A good lover doesn’t follow a program but is open to feel, explore and play. It is driven by curiosity rather than closed off by a special agenda.
6. It is not just the clitoris, but the whole vulva
As you can see on the images and who the clitoris is situated you have a lot of area to play with. You can map the area. You can tease your partner by giving more attention to pleasurable but not the most intense areas, and occasionally go to the sweetest spot the most preferred way.
Labia can feel so amazing and the more area you involve in your pleasure time, the more open to pleasure her pussy will be (if you play it right).
You can play with pressure or how much area you play with. It is all juicy and you have so much freedom here to create huge amounts of pleasure waves and drive her crazy the best and most satisfying ways.
7. Build your pleasure toolbox
Your pleasure toolbox consists of your knowledge and special touches and also of real toys that are working for both you. Rather you choose to use your hands or a toy you can have the hottest pleasure.
Like what? (I know you know some of these and also if you have already opened your mind to my tips you do these things just maybe you hadn’t named them.)
Edging: You just go on, until you stop. And wait. And let her beg you for more. The closer she is to orgasm, the sweeter the game is. And when you let her come it will be so big she will remember it for a long time. (Be careful with those who are primarily sexuals in the Erotic Blueprints.) You don’t let them come and maybe they will smack you on the face. You have to reassure them they will have their orgasm at the end. And do less rounds on them, because you can build frustration as well with the orgasm.
Pairing: You need 2 hands with this one or a very capable one hand or some extra toys. Combining clitoral stimulation with other yummy stimulation. Double the fun, baby.
Accenting: You focus on one part or one kind of touch as a part of a bigger touch. Like giving more pressure to the left side of the clitoris and going lighter on the other side. Or go around the whole vulva, but you go slow on the labia and fast over the clitoris.
Rhythm: I think you know what I mean. It can be inspired by a light rain, your favourite songs or a thunderstorm. It is up to what works for the both of you at that moment.
Surprise: You can have your rhythm and consistency and all of a sudden you do something else. Something unexpected. Different pressure, angle, touch, speed… This helps to renew the focus on the body for those who can easily be bored or are in their heads a lot.
Consistency: But some vulva owners prefer consistency. You just go on and on the same way, same speed, same pressure… So that she can just relax into the safety of the abundance of pleasure.
Hinting: You focus on other areas than the sweetest spot. Except occasionally when you slightly go for the sweet spot. Just to keep it more interesting and also to awaken other areas to more pleasure.
Orbiting: Going around and around the head of the clitoris (use really good lubrication) hundreds of different ways.
Upstrokes and downstrokes: Upstrokes usually feel more arousing. It is almost like turning the excitement up. Downstrokes can feel more like calming, feeling safe and expanding pleasure in a different way. Check what she is up to at that moment. Up, down or riding the rollercoaster? This is not just about the clitoris, but the whole vulva.
Rocking: Labia especially loves rocking. The constant contact with changing pressure or meeting points can feel divine.
What are the best sex toys to involve?
Bullets and finger vibrators
These little vibrating toys are kinda your best friends here. Don’t underestimate how little they are. They are super powerful. Some are on the softer side like this Rechargeable Power Bullet. Some are harder and more pointed to target the sensation on one specific area, like my favourite bullet here.
Finger vibrators have some areas to establish an easy hold over the toy so it is almost like using your finger so you don’t have to worry about managing a vibrator in your hand.
Satisfyer has a really good one (the Teaser Ultimate Stimulation), that I also had a review about. But the luxury finger vibrator is also a good option if you are looking for a battery operated one always ready for your command.
The Lust Fingers are not just for penetration. They are also amazing to change your fingers into something very different and exciting. The texture will add to the pleasure. Yumm.
Sensation enhancers can be special lubes or other gels/oils that are made for creating a new way of stimulation. The Doc Johnson Nipple and Clitoris Stimulating Gel is using mint to create extra tingles.
The Orgasm Drops create more blood flow to the area so that she can feel more. I have to add here that what a woman prefers and works for her is unique. So always try these enhancers in small quantities first. Preferably not during sex. And wash them away if she doesn’t like them.
The ID Pleasure Lube is one of the favourite here for people. Using something with a tingling effect that adds to the lubrication. So if you are into tingles, that is a double win.
Those who go for luxury (especially the primary Sensuals in the Erotic Blueprints) will love the High On Love - Stimulation Orgasm Oil. It is a real indulgence for a delicious pussy that wants something different.
Pussy pumps create a vacuum and a sucking sensation that can feel pleasurable and at the same time the blood flow of the area is drastically enhanced, the whole vulva engorges and becomes super sensitive. (Always add lubrication.)
It is an exciting play on its own and at the same time as a preparation for something very different than what you usually expedience.
Of course I can’t leave the vibrating wands out. They are powerful and famous for providing intense orgasms and fast. And this is true in most cases but at the same time don’t expect them to really be a magic wand :). If they don’t work for her the reason is not that she is broken. Maybe she doesn’t like the vibration frequency and or depth. Sometimes powerful vibrations can actually be a turn off for people. I just really wanted to mention this here as well.
At the same time most women love them and not “just” on the clitoris but over the whole vulva. A wand playing around the vaginal opening can even induce some squirting without any penetration.
My main recommendation from those that I have tried is the Doxy Massager. Super powerful, plug in wand that can even provide some variety with a pulse option. There is a reason why it is the legend of the area.
This wave just gets bigger and bigger. For a reason. Clitoris suckers are addictive. I mean the good ones like the Satisfyer Pro 2+ (and Pro 3+) or the Twitch (which operates very differently from the other ones) that provide suction and vibration even at the same time. The suction itself feels very different from the vibrations.
Womanizer was the first that came out with this technology. And the whole world is thankful for them.
I know there is even more here. Have you read my post about the different types of touches and how to awaken your hands? If not, it is time to do so. If yes, maybe you should check back.