Every woman needs these in her bedroom

I talk to quite a lot of women who want to start self-pleasuring and finding ways to have more orgasms and buzz while they are masturbating. Or sometimes they would be even happy with at least having the desire to masturbate.

The less you have experiences when you can “just” explore, feel and ride the waves of pleasure, the less probable that you can feel arousal in the moment and act on it.

If you have a usual track or routine to cum, so you do the same thing over and over again, the more probable is that at one point your level of arousal and pleasure are going to decrease or become more “grey”.

Massage oil

You don’t need massage oils only to give/receive messages from/to a partner. Massages are important to connect with our bodies and relax into the present. This is especially true to breast massages.

Massaging your breasts slowly and gently with oil opens the gate for more pleasure, more orgasms. Even if you don’t do anything else “only” the breast massage, and stop at this point you are creating intimacy and trust. This is an important pillar in your self-intimacy.

Of course you can massage other parts too and some very clean intimate oils are perfect to massage the yoni/pussy as well.  

Check out the massage oils here.

Sensual toys

When women buy their first sex toys, they are usually looking for a vibrator. But as you need foreplay when you are with a partner you also need it when you are alone. So having some sensual toys is a guarantee that you can have it rather than whether you have a partner or not. In some ways massage oils also belong to this category, but as they are essential, the other kinds of sensation based items are more optional. I mean it is different from person to person what are the ideal ones for them. I want to give you inspiration to nourish your senses.

Something to taste

Let’s clarify this at the beginning. Eating something that you enjoy and indulging in it is pleasurable, so you are actually self-pleasuring. :) At least this is how I see it.
You can add this to your self-pleasure session when you want to create an erotic experience for yourself.
It can be some amazing chocolate. Or ice cream. Or cake. Or whipped cream. Or fruit. Or whatever indulging in the pleasure of tastes means to you.
Play with the textures, tease yourself, be present, enjoy every second of it.
You can even prepare a tray with delicious stuff, blindfold yourself and enjoy all the goodies.

Something to smell

This can be a scented candle or an aromatic oil or your partner’s T-shirt or whatever would provide pleasure to you. Scents have a direct access to your nervous system, so never underestimate what they can add to your level of well-being.

Something to see

Your environment can have a big role in whether you can melt into the moment or not. The colours and shapes around you. So as cleanliness.
You can wear something that is pleasing to see just for your own pleasure.
Or maybe just admire how your oiled skin glows.
Or the colour of your skin.
Or close your eyes and imagine something that you would love to see. Something that you find hot and sexy. It is all for you. And I know that the place where everything is about you can be scary, and you can feel lost if you haven't been there much.

Something to touch

Textures and your skin are a match made in heaven. All the materials including your skin and your hair are there for you to feel. Experiment with things. What would feel amazing to you? Feel other materials that maybe you wouldn’t even consider as a pleasure toy, until you allow yourself to have an experience with them.

Something to listen too

Maybe your first thought is music here. I especially recommend headphones, so that all the sounds can fill your world. I love energetic and sensual music. I feel so light and free listening to them, feel the energy in me and just fly with it.

But of course loud music and movement are amazing too. It is making me want to move. To feel the flow. To be active while I am receptive. 

But music is not your only choice.

What about listening to good porn rather than watching it?

Audio erotica?

Your orgasms recorded?

Your partners' orgasms recorded saying your name?


Give yourself ease. Lube can provide that. Everything feels different when you use lube. Your hand sliding without resistance. It feels so good. This is why you need good lube at home.

Choose your lube here.

Glass dildo

Think of a dildo before you think of a vbrator. Allow yourself to feel more. It feels more natural. I know that vibrators are shown to be a quick fix to cum fast or cum at all. And vibrators can do that. And they can feel amazing, don’t get me wrong.

But give a chance to dildos. Especially to glass dildos. They are going to help you to feel more, to explore what is actually your natural response.
They are amazing to clear blocks in your vagina.
They can provide you the pressure that your g-spot likes.
They can help you to squirt if this is what you would like.
They are so versatile.

Choose a curved one. It is perfect for massaging too. Like this dildo

Texture is also something that can be the source of a lot of pleasure. This dildo feels mind-blowing. Every movement is so perfect.

Choose your glass dildo here.

A wedge and/or vinyl sheets

I left these to the last because they are not essential, but they are awesome. I know that towels and pillows can help to change your position or protect your bedding from moisture, but when you have the proper equipment you don’t have to worry about the surroundings, you can “just” let yourself go and have fun. 

Get your vinyl sheet here.

Wedges also can give you more support and positions that otherwise are not possible all of a sudden are available. They are also waterproof, so one less thing on your mind, more space to pleasure. Even if it is “just” self-pleasure, you are going to profit from the more angles.

Do you have any questions? Write to me and ask at the sexcoach@playblue.ie

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