Ladies and Gentlemen, it’s that time of year again! Books are being covered, new pencil cases are being agonized over and uniform shop changing rooms are crammed with cranky teens. But Back to School Season isn’t just a big deal for the kids, it’s a huge sigh of relief for us adults too. Freeeeedom!
And what better way to celebrate that freedom than with a brand new piece of shiny for your top drawer? Whether you’ve got some tots going back to primary school or you’re a thot going back to college, here are our top picks for some adult back to school shopping.
Our first pick is for the real winners of the back to school period - parents! Congrats, you did it. What are you going to do with all the free time? How about those early bed-times? I think you know where this is going. We think you need to get yourself something reliable but also discreet. This Sweet Smile Rechargeable Dual Massager ticks those boxes. It’s rechargable so you don’t need to remember batteries and it’s just a back massager if grubby little eyes happen to see it.
For the College Students amongst us, welcome or welcome back to what will hopefully be one of the most experimental, fun times in your life. Pffft. Okay, in reality college is probably going to be more like hanging out with a group of drunk toddlers than hanging out with Janis Joplin at Woodstock but that doesn’t mean you can’t still have a little fun. Since you’re hopefully going to be out and about all the time during the school year our pick for you is the Sticky Vibes Glossy Silver. It’s discreet, the price won’t eat into your SUSI grant too much and it’s small enough to fit into a going out bag. We do not depend on drunk freshers to make us cum after Coppers ladies. Put that on my headstone.
When we talk about Back to School, we often forget one particular group of people: Educators. Teachers, professors, creche workers - whatever. They're the people responsible for molding the minds of your kids...and they're the ones taking them off your hands for the day. They deserve some kudos...and a monster toy to get them through the stress of dealing with young people For you, we recommend the IRide by Doc Johnson - essentially a dildo rocking horse, yes it's intense but what else would you need to forget about the tedium of teaching math to spotty teens?!
Whether you're a student, parent or teacher this is a special time. Don't forget, the learning doesn't stop outside the classroom and it shouldn't stop in the bedroom either!