When it comes to being aroused, what is your challenge?
Is it being in your head?
Or all of a sudden are you “checking out”?
Do you feel inadequate, like you should be more aroused than you actually are?
Whatever your challenge is, you are not powerless. Opening up to pleasure, creating more arousal and elevating your receptivity are skills that you can develop (if you want to).
Your journey to bliss is unique, hence your arousal map, your challenges and your goals are very unique too. The more authentic you can be, the more present and consistent you can be, the more loving you can be with yourself the more pleasure you are going to tune into.
I’m going to share 3 tools with you that can help to change your inner state. You will find ease, joy and aliveness, so these are perfect for first steps.
The pleasure breath
Breathing techniques have always been super effective to change inner states, help to connect deeply, release and nourish. The pleasure breath is my favorite of them. It is easy, it is clearing your head right away, it is tuning you to aliveness.
I made a video, so that you can easily do it.
Check in first with yourself. How do you feel?
Do at least 3 rounds of pleasure breaths, and check in again. How are you feeling now?
The pleasure breath is for anybody who is looking for feeling more alive and joyful.
Move authentically
Movement is an amazing way to feel your body, to tune into feelings, to really be you. I don’t ask my clients to dance, I ask them to move authentically. This means that you only move the way you feel it. This is not about what you think is sexy. This is not about following anybody’s choreography. It is about you being you and moving the way that you want. ONLY. And you move only when you feel like it. You wait to feel your body. You wait for the impulse. If you don’t have that you allow yourself to just stay. THIS IS ABOUT YOUR CHOICE. This is about your freedom. This is about giving yourself space to express yourself, feel yourself…
And this can feel uncomfortable first to those who are not in touch with their feelings. Whose boundaries have been crossed badly can find it more difficult to tune in first. Give yourself time to find the connection. And be as authentic as you can. It is not about being sexy. You can feel funny, sad, angry, playful, numb, excited… whatever. Move accordingly.
Be radical and trick your mind
One of my favourite tools is the monkey face. It looks totally crazy. And it is very effective when your mind wants to control everything. The monkey face is about you making all crazy movements, sounds and faces. Lost of them. Move like a monkey. Change your faces fast from one to the other. Make some crazy sounds.
Why? Because when you do this, your mind can’t decide if you are happy or angry or whatever. So your mind just gives up to understand what is happening, or trying to find out what is next. This is setting you free. You feel crazy first :), but then you will feel liberated.
Do you need support? Write to me at sexcoach@playblue.ie.